How To Become An Expert Networker

contentimageswordpress201405networkingforlatinombaslamsocialclub1jpg
I absolutely loathe the term networking

Really I do Just saying the word instantly brings up the cliche scenario of the
sleazy salesman or woman shoving a business card down your throat

Buy my product You need my service I know EVERYONE in the room  Im a
special snowflake Me Me Me

Gag

If the previous scenario is something you aspire to emulate do us both a favor
and scroll your mouse up to the top right corner and click the x

Still with me Good It appears you have a soul

The Dirty Little Secret No One Tells You
Ready for the secret

Here it is Networking is a learnable skill

It doesnt matter if youre an introvert It doesnt matter if your little
sister can do more pushups than you It doesnt matter if you failed your last
three calculus tests

It doesnt matter if you live in your moms basement or run a multiple million
dollar business from an internet connection in Thailand It doesnt matter if
you have a PHD or if you majored in being a couch potato

It doesnt matter if you think youre bad with people It doesnt matter if you
dont have thousands of Twitter followers and slick looking blog

It Doesnt Matter

If youre reading this who you are where youre from is irrelevant Unless of
course youre that guy who posts pictures of your sixpack abs on Instagram in
that case no one likes you Please click the x

I know you scanners are growing impatient but first let me tell you a personal
story

For most of my life I held the limiting belief that I could never be good with
people I genuinely believed that I was destined to simply be the background
noise others heard in the room I was envious of the people who owned center
stage

Instead of trying to improve I gave up I shied away from people Worse yet I
felt like there was absolutely nothing I could do to grow

Luckily I was able to overcome those limiting beliefs by learning from the best
around I devoured the ideas and methods of greats such as Gary Vaynerchuk
Ramit Sethi Dale Carnegie Steve Pavlina Lewis Howes and countless other
successful individuals who seemed to get the art of relating to people

I tried some things and stumbled But over time I began seeing patterns of how
people began to relate with me My hard work started to pay off

It took me many years of testing and tweaking not to mention FAILURE to
discover that I really could be good with people just as long as I put in the
work

While those who know me would undoubtedly consider me an extrovert Im
confident that the following tips can apply to anyone who wants to improve their
relationships both online and IRL In real life

9 Simple Ways To Become An Expert Networker
1 Change Your Mindset

Stop thinking in terms of networking and instead aim to make connecting with
people part of your every day life Its not a game to be won its a life to be
lived Every relationship you have is an opportunity to learn and grow as a
person Some relationships will be short term others you will carry with you
for the rest of your life

Not every personal or business interaction will go as planned sometimes this
will be a pleasant surprise other times not so much Ah life

Be open Be vulnerable Soak in the lessons reflected by the alltelling
relationship mirror

2 Show Up

You cant genuinely connect with people by playing ping pong inside your head
It takes some actual practice on the field Tie your laces and go

If you lean more on the extrovert side of the spectrum set a goal of meeting up
with 2 people for coffee a week If youre more introverted queue up your
favorite social network or open your email and dig in Some of the connections
wont go anywhere but each time you reach out to someone theres a lesson to be
learned

As you begin connecting with more and more people developing these
relationships will become more and more natural Thats a good thing It means
youre growing

At Exosphere participants have been challenged to connect with 10 people who
could help them on their current projects and goals Some have set up coffee
meetings here in Chile others have reached out to professionals in their
desired field For many it has been an uncomfortable challenge What if they
get rejected How do they find the right people to talk to

Nothing worth doing is easy Those who show up often win

3 Play To Your Strengths

Theres a common misconception that in order to be successful you must be an
extrovert which is absolutely not the case As Susan Cain shares in her amazing
book Quiet there are plenty of introverts dominating the world

Albert Einstein preferred to spend the bulk his time alone Harrison Ford gets
NERVOUS when giving a speech in his movies JK Rowlings introversion made her
the first billionaire author in the world

Where you fall on the spectrum does not matter What matters is that you know
how you operate and play to your strengths

If youre an extrovert be extroverted If youre an introvert genuinely connect
through other introverted means

Were all playing the same game

4 Add Value Without Expectations

So many people operate their every day lives by seeking ways in which the world
can give them something But the people that really understand the world of
relationships know the goal should be reversed

Instead of seeking ways to add value for yourself openly seek ways to add value
to others The more value you add to others around you the more value youll
receive in return

Send an amazing book you recently read to a a mentor or business partner Help
your colleague perfect that presentation shes giving in a week Mock interview
your friend whos looking for a job

Adding value obviously takes effort Thats the point If youre one of the few
able to consistently help those around you youll stand out as someone who is
trustworthy and worthy of assistance in the future

Drop the youscratchmybackandIllscratchyoursmentality Focus on looking
for ways to add value instead Add value with zero expectations and everyone
wins

5 Create A Value System

According British anthropologist Robin Dunbar we as humans only have the
capacity to hold 150 meaningful relationships at any given time While there is
some room for debate on the accuracy of this limit the fact is we do have a
limited capacity to connect on a genuine level

As your network grows its important you do everything you can to keep your
connections alive and fresh

For me this means giving someone a call if I havent talked to them in a few
months to see how they are Sometimes Ill simply send an email checking in
Some people like keeping a spreadsheet categorizing their relationships and
reminds them when to touch base and others simply like to go with the flow

This is a personal call here Do what youre comfortable with Dont be sleazy
or inauthentic Theres certainly a noticeable difference between checking in
because you need something and really being interested in their well being
Dont be that guy

6 Have Random Conversations

Some of my best personal and professional relationships began from a random chat
or chance meeting You never know how any one relationship will develop

My former boss Gary Vaynerchuk has preached the importance of random meetings
before

I personally try to set aside time each day specifically for random meetings or
a Skype call with people I know on Twitter When Im traveling I generally try
to talk to the person Im sitting next to on the plane It doesnt always turn
into anything but the value Ive received in return has significantly
outweighed the time and effort Ive put in

This doesnt mean be wasteful with your time just leave space open for the
unexpected

7 Become A Connector

One of the benefits of being a great networker is that it opens doors for you to
be able to connect other people In the last week alone Ive connected three
different parties simply by retweeting people who were looking for help

The more people you know the more people you can help When listening to
peoples struggles and issues always be thinking of when an intro to a friend
would be a great fit

As you connect more and more people youll quickly become the go to resource for
people in your networking looking to change the world If youre a connector
youre indispensable

8 Fail

When I first began reaching out to expand my network I emailed a very respected
entrepreneur in the midwest I began the email Hi Sarah

The entrepreneur was a man

Youre going to say the wrong things Youre going to get rejected Some of the
connections you put effort into wont pan out Some coffee meetings will be
awkward You might not get a response to the email you spent an two hours
writing

The only way to get better with people is by making mistakes

Keep growing Be human

9 Ask Great Questions

Most of the amazing networkers I know have the uncanny ability to ask great
questions

The questions they ask motivate you they get you unstuck The questions they
ask add value to you

Great networkers dont waste peoples time asking lazy and uninspired questions
They do the work and their questions show it

If youre asking for mentorship dont ask something that can be Googled If
youre trying to help someone with a problem dig deep

The quality of questions you ask is directly correlated with the size of your
success

What are you going to do

Heres yet another dirty secret Despite what all the marketers are trying to
sell you theres no info product you can buy or button you can press to make
you radiate with charisma Good ol fashioned hard work is the only path to
victory

Most people reading this will nod their head in agreement only to check
Facebook seconds after reading

The truth is I want YOU to be different I want you to develop the skills and
produce the value needed to stand out The world needs more leaders

If you want to become a great connector of people and ideas you have to put in
the work

The steps are clear No more excuses

The world is your network

Steemit
httpssteemitcomlifeaboundlessworld9simplewaystobecomeanexpertnetworkerevenifyoureanextrovert

in Uncategorized |

How To Become An Expert Networker

networking-for-latino-mbas-lam-social-club1
I absolutely loathe the term “networking”.

Really I do. Just saying the word instantly brings up the cliche scenario of the sleazy salesman (or woman) shoving a business card down your throat.

“Buy my product! You need my service! I know EVERYONE in the room — I’m a special snowflake! Me. Me. Me.”

Gag.

If the previous scenario is something you aspire to emulate, do us both a favor and scroll your mouse up to the top right corner and click the “x.”

Still with me? Good. It appears you have a soul.

The Dirty Little Secret No One Tells You.
Ready for the secret?

Here it is: Networking is a learnable skill.

It doesn’t matter if you’re an introvert. It doesn’t matter if your little sister can do more pushups than you. It doesn’t matter if you failed your last three calculus tests.

It doesn’t matter if you live in your mom’s basement or run a multiple million dollar business from an internet connection in Thailand. It doesn’t matter if you have a PHD or if you majored in being a couch potato.

It doesn’t matter if you think you’re bad with people. It doesn’t matter if you don’t have thousands of Twitter followers and slick looking blog.

It. Doesn’t. Matter.

If you’re reading this: who you are, where you’re from, is irrelevant. Unless of course you’re that guy who posts pictures of your six-pack abs on Instagram, in that case no one likes you. Please click the x.

I know you scanners are growing impatient, but first let me tell you a personal story.

For most of my life, I held the limiting belief that I could never be “good with people.” I genuinely believed that I was destined to simply be the background noise others heard in the room. I was envious of the people who owned center stage.

Instead of trying to improve, I gave up. I shied away from people. Worse yet, I felt like there was absolutely nothing I could do to grow.

Luckily, I was able to overcome those limiting beliefs by learning from the best around. I devoured the ideas and methods of greats such as Gary Vaynerchuk, Ramit Sethi, Dale Carnegie, Steve Pavlina, Lewis Howes ,and countless other successful individuals who seemed to “get” the art of relating to people.

I tried some things, and stumbled. But over time, I began seeing patterns of how people began to relate with me. My hard work started to pay off!

It took me many years of testing and tweaking (not to mention FAILURE) to discover that I really could be “good with people” just as long as I put in the work.

While those who know me would undoubtedly consider me an extrovert, I’m confident that the following tips can apply to anyone who wants to improve their relationships both online and IRL (In real life.)

9 Simple Ways To Become An Expert Networker
1. Change Your Mindset

Stop thinking in terms of “networking” and instead aim to make connecting with people part of your every day life. It’s not a game to be won, it’s a life to be lived. Every relationship you have is an opportunity to learn and grow as a person. Some relationships will be short term, others you will carry with you for the rest of your life.

Not every personal or business interaction will go as planned, sometimes this will be a pleasant surprise, other times not so much. Ah, life.

Be open. Be vulnerable. Soak in the lessons reflected by the all-telling- relationship mirror.

2. Show Up

You can’t genuinely connect with people by playing ping pong inside your head. It takes some actual practice on the field. Tie your laces and go!

If you lean more on the extrovert side of the spectrum, set a goal of meeting up with 2 people for coffee a week. If you’re more introverted, queue up your favorite social network or open your email and dig in. Some of the connections won’t go anywhere, but each time you reach out to someone there’s a lesson to be learned.

As you begin connecting with more and more people, developing these relationships will become more and more natural! That’s a good thing! It means you’re growing!

At Exosphere participants have been challenged to connect with 10 people who could help them on their current projects and goals. Some have set up coffee meetings here in Chile, others have reached out to professionals in their desired field. For many, it has been an uncomfortable challenge. What if they get rejected? How do they find the right people to talk to?

Nothing worth doing is easy. Those who show up often, win.

3. Play To Your Strengths

There’s a common misconception that in order to be successful you must be an extrovert, which is absolutely not the case. As Susan Cain shares in her amazing book “Quiet”, there are plenty of introverts dominating the world.

Albert Einstein preferred to spend the bulk his time alone. Harrison Ford gets NERVOUS when giving a speech in his movies? J.K Rowling’s introversion made her the first billionaire author in the world.

Where you fall on the spectrum does not matter. What matters is that you know how you operate and play to your strengths.

If you’re an extrovert be extroverted! If you’re an introvert genuinely connect through other introverted means.

We’re all playing the same game.

4. Add Value Without Expectations

So many people operate their every day lives by seeking ways in which the world can give them something. But the people that really understand the world of relationships know the goal should be reversed.

Instead of seeking ways to add value for yourself, openly seek ways to add value to others. The more value you add to others around you the more value you’ll receive in return.

Send an amazing book you recently read to a a mentor or business partner. Help your colleague perfect that presentation she’s giving in a week. Mock interview your friend who’s looking for a job.

Adding value obviously takes effort. That’s the point! If you’re one of the few able to consistently help those around you, you’ll stand out as someone who is trustworthy and worthy of assistance in the future.

Drop the you-scratch-my-back-and-I’ll-scratch-yours-mentality. Focus on looking for ways to add value instead. Add value with zero expectations and everyone wins.

5. Create A Value System

According British anthropologist Robin Dunbar we as humans only have the capacity to hold 150 meaningful relationships at any given time. While there is some room for debate on the accuracy of this limit, the fact is, we do have a limited capacity to connect on a genuine level.

As your network grows, it’s important you do everything you can to keep your connections alive and fresh.

For me, this means giving someone a call if I haven’t talked to them in a few months to see how they are. Sometimes I’ll simply send an email checking in. Some people like keeping a spreadsheet categorizing their relationships and reminds them when to touch base, and others simply like to go with the flow.

This is a personal call here. Do what you’re comfortable with. Don’t be sleazy or inauthentic. There’s certainly a noticeable difference between checking in because you need something and really being interested in their well being. Don’t be that guy.

6. Have Random Conversations

Some of my best personal and professional relationships began from a random chat or chance meeting. You never know how any one relationship will develop.

My former boss Gary Vaynerchuk has preached the importance of random meetings before.

I personally try to set aside time each day specifically for random meetings or a Skype call with people I know on Twitter. When I’m traveling I generally try to talk to the person I’m sitting next to on the plane. It doesn’t always turn into anything, but the value I’ve received in return has significantly outweighed the time and effort I’ve put in.

This doesn’t mean be wasteful with your time, just leave space open for the unexpected.

7. Become A Connector

One of the benefits of being a great networker is that it opens doors for you to be able to connect other people. In the last week alone, I’ve connected three different parties simply by retweeting people who were looking for help.

The more people you know, the more people you can help. When listening to people’s struggles and issues always be thinking of when an intro to a friend would be a great fit.

As you connect more and more people you’ll quickly become the go to resource for people in your networking looking to change the world. If you’re a connector you’re indispensable.

8. Fail

When I first began reaching out to expand my network I emailed a very respected entrepreneur in the midwest. I began the email “Hi, Sarah,”

The entrepreneur was a man.

You’re going to say the wrong things. You’re going to get rejected. Some of the connections you put effort into won’t pan out. Some coffee meetings will be awkward. You might not get a response to the email you spent an two hours writing.

The only way to get better with people is by making mistakes.

Keep growing. Be human.

9. Ask Great Questions

Most of the amazing networkers I know have the uncanny ability to ask great questions.

The questions they ask motivate you, they get you unstuck. The questions they ask add value to you.

Great networkers don’t waste people’s time asking lazy and uninspired questions. They do the work and their questions show it.

If you’re asking for mentorship, don’t ask something that can be Googled. If you’re trying to help someone with a problem, dig deep.

The quality of questions you ask is directly correlated with the size of your success.

What are you going to do?

Here’s yet another dirty secret. Despite what all the marketers are trying to sell you, there’s no info product you can buy or button you can press to make you radiate with charisma. Good o’l fashioned hard work is the only path to victory.

Most people reading this will nod their head in agreement, only to check Facebook seconds after reading.

The truth is, I want YOU to be different. I want you to develop the skills and produce the value needed to stand out. The world needs more leaders.

If you want to become a great connector of people and ideas you have to put in the work.

The steps are clear. No more excuses.

The world is your network.

Steemit