One of my goals for the year is to do more public speaking. So I decided it would be in my best interest to take a communications course. I really look forward to developing my speaking skills and becoming more comfortable in front of a large audience. My speech today was about the death of my best friend and how it affected me. While it was somewhat difficult to revisit those memories I felt a strong connection with him today.
Marco has and always will be large part of my life. I miss him greatly. His passing had a tremendous impact on all those who loved him.
While the quality of the video is only OK, I feel you can still get something out of my speech. I typed the text out as well in case you have trouble hearing. Over all, I was very proud of how it turned out. I put a lot of time and effort into writing and practicing my speech. I was a bit shaky at times, but I feel I conveyed the message well.
Assuming my future speeches relate to the topic of personal development, I plan on posting those as well. Enjoy.
Intro:
Have you ever lost someone or something close to you? A parent? A relative? A friend?
Maybe you’ve grieved the death of a beloved pet or two. Or perhaps you’ve yet to experience the death of a loved one. Regardless, death is something that one must experience in his or her life time. For as Benjamin Franklin once said ” In this world nothing can said to be certain except death and taxes.”
Death:
My first experience with death occurred just two years ago. The loss of a best friend to be exact.
“I’ll see you tomorrow man” I said as Marco and I parted ways. Little did I know it was the last time I would see his goofy smile.
I will never forget the day, the day in which I witnessed my friend pass away right before my very eyes. A day in which a tragic jet ski accident took his young life.
The beach. The jet ski. The blood. The tears. It all happened so fast. Yet the gruesome images of the day continues to remain embedded in my mind. Watching someone die is never easy.
The Move To China:
During the summer of my sophomore year my family was transferred from The Woodlands Texas to Shanghai China. Moving across the world was no simple task. And quite frankly I was scared.
New culture. New school. New friends.
Marco and I quickly connected.
When I missed home he comforted me. When I was stressed out about school he hit me and told me to chill out. When I was bored he was always there to entertain me. Not bad qualities for a best friend.
I remember one particular time in which I was not very impressed with my 2.9 GPA and was voicing this displeasure to Marco. He smiled and said ” Bud I have a 2.4 I don’t want to hear you complaining.” Suffice to say I never complained again.
Impact:
Although I only knew him for 6 months I looked to him as a brother. A brother who I was able to share anything with. His death to this day remains significant moment in my life.
While his death was difficult ,it awoken me to truly live. His presence inspired me to pursue my passions of writing and grow in ways I never thought were possible.
When reflecting on his death I like to look at it as if a rock was dropped in a pond. His death created a splash that affected the hundreds of people who loved him. Yet when you take the time to dry off you appreciate life that much more. While it’s hard to justify why someone so young can die, his death brought his friends and family together as one.
Conclusion:
It has been said that we exist by opposites. We love because we hate. We’re happy because we are sad.
I like to believe that we live because we die.
Far too many people simply exist. They just get by. But there’s more to life than that. Death reminds us to pursue our time here on earth at full speed. We mustn’t let fears dictate how we live. We must strive to live live with compassion and let our souls do the speaking. We must live out tomorrow today.
For as Joan Borysenko once said “The question is not whether we will die, but how we will live.”
His death caused me for the first time to ponder my purpose here on earth. And I am immensely grateful for his love and friendship. Marco I miss you.
I would like to share with you the following a poem I wrote a few days after Marco’s death.
Your laugh was annoying
Your smile was grand
One day I hope to understand
your stay was short
but all worthwhile
for every one who saw you
couldn’t help but smile
When I was worried
you told me not to be
And it is now that I finally see
how much you affected me
first friend in shanghai
keeping me real
for when I was down
you helped me feel
You wanted to be a pilot
to fly free and to roam
now with no boundaries
heaven is your home.
In the heart of the phoenix
you will continue you to soar
know that we miss you
and love you more.
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Bud,
Thanks for sharing this. The loss of someone we care for is a tough thing to put into words. I think you did a good job with your speech, and your poem. Writing about it helps for sure.
It is said that when we really accept our own deaths we can really experience life (and stop just “existing” as you mentioned). Often times, the passing for someone we’re loved brings us closer to the real, full experience of “aliveness” and all that comes with it.
Sorry for your loss,
Miche
t has been said that we exist by opposites. We love because we hate. We’re happy because we are sad.
I like to believe that we live because we die.
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Good job bud; it really is crazy that it’s almost been two years. He will for sure always be remembered as everyone of us in Concordia has taken memories of marco with us as we all split our own ways. Hope everything is well with you! Lets wait for a summer reunion in shanghai. Miss you x
I miss him too, almost every day. But the spark he carried, that ripple that touched us all, I feel like that is what drives me to be my best every morning.
Bud. seeing you grow as a writer and reading this and all the other entries you have has made me love you even more, even prouder to call you my friend. And I’m glad to think that it’s the Marco in us that causes us to be great.
I think it’s wonderful you got to share this with your class. I miss you too. It was nice to read that, and I hope to read more. I hope you are well and I hope that your spark burns for a long, long time. And I hope to hear from you soon. Take care, man.
Hey thanks for that Bud it was great.
Bud, man, putting your speech up there is just bad*ss. Seriously, it’s one thing to do it in front of your class, but another to put it in front of everyone else. Clearly you’ve chosen love (for your friend) over fear, and that makes you very admirable.
I can’t remember who said this but the quote goes something like this “It’s not whethere there’s life after death, but whether there was life before death.”
Great post, Bud!
Thanks everyone for all the comments.
@Miche: There is no need to be sorry my friend. He lives with me to this day.
@Brian: I don’t look at posting my speech as “badass.” His death has had a profound impact on me as a person and I am who I am today largely because of him. This blog is dedicated to his presence.
Bud, God put you here for a reason. You were put in my life for a reason. You were also given a gift, as was I,and you’ve shown it exceptionally well. I wish I could use mine to such greatness as you. You are my idol and I look up to the way you’ve moved forward with this through your writing. Unfortunately I am still struggling to forgive myself, but every time I read your blog I feel empowered to make change, to use what I’ve learned, and open up. I love you with all my heart, and I am so proud of you Bud.
Heart warming post, as always!
It is good that you did not waste your energy fearing, but using most of your energy to say what your heart needs to say! That is putting energy at the appropriate place!
Congratulations, but I have yet to do it (it will be nice to try)!
Yes things happen for a reason according to Alana!
That was great Bud, thanks, i miss you, it was good to hear your voice again =)
Hey kid. I remember that day very well. You were crying deeply and having a hard time even breathing. I was pretty torn up myself. You looked up at me with tears in your eyes and you asked me “WHY, why do things like this happen Dad?” So with all the courage I could muster, I told you, “When you were 2 and you asked me why you could not play with the knife, I told you that you hurt yourself and I love you too much to let that happen. When you were 5 and you asked me what 3X3 was, I told you 9. When you were 11 and you asked me about girls, I told you. I have always had an answer. But now, with Marco dead, you ask me why things like this happen, and I have no answer. There is no one answer. Each one of us has to figure out how we grow from such things and what we will learn.”
Sure seems like you have figured all this out. Glad the speech went well. Keep up the good work.
Bud,
Great job!! <3<3<3 I am so proud of you, and all of Marco's friends. Continue to take with you (all of you) the wonderful memories of Marco, continue to dream, and know that you are so much bigger than you think you are.
Sending a big hug to all of Marco's friends as they begin their freshman year of College! You guys are incredible people….so live incredible lives, as you hold Marco in your heart
Hey Bud!
Wow,moving speech man. So tragic
I agree, there is little point to life except to live it as much as you can, don’t fret the little things and follow your heart.
My respects to Marco.
@Diggy Thanks for the comment man. It was a tough time for sure but made me realize what it is that drives me.